wabi-sabi weight loss

Wabi-sabi is not only a style, but a Japanese philosophy based in Zen and built on three principles: nothing lasts, nothing ends, and nothing is perfect. “Wabi” means a deliberate humility, a lack of materialism, and a deep connection with the environment. “Sabi” is different. It literally translates as “bloom of time.” Taken together, Wabi-Sabi is a worldview that perceives beauty in roughness, elegance in imperfection, and serenity in the natural process of decay. Wabi-Sabi is homespun and homemade, the chip on the lip of a pot, the patina on a copper box, the new colors and textures objects take on as they age. More than just aesthetics, wabi-sabi extends into all parts of life. It’s a philosophy that believes enlightenment comes with the acceptance of material impermanence.

So how does Wabi Sabi come into weight loss? For me, calming down and accepting things (and myself) for what they are helps me stay focused on what is true. Thoughtless commercial food consumption is an extension of materialism (and probably hoarding). It is that haunting need to have more. To have the bright shiny thing that comes in a package: a big mac, a snickers, a deep-fried happy hour special that comes piled high on a plate. Wabi sabi is not like that. Wabi Sabi is quiet. It is humble, like an ordinary apple, a bowl of black beans or a handful of green beans. Wabi Sabi is pure, and intentional, and imperfect.

letting go

"Two monks were on a pilgrimage. One day, they came to a deep river. At the edge of the river, a young woman sat weeping because she was afraid to cross the river without help. She begged the two monks to help her. The younger monk turned his back. The members of their order were forbidden to touch a woman.

But the older monk picked up the woman without a word and carried her across the river. He put her down on the far side and continued his journey. The younger monk came after him, scolding him and berating him for breaking his vows. He went on this way for a long time.

Finally, at the end of the day the older monk turned to the younger one. "I only carried her across the river. You have been carrying her all day."

Letting go can be difficult. Letting go of people, ideas, expectations, desires; letting go of bad habits, false beliefs and unhealthy relationships... the list goes on. Every day, every moment presents an opportunity to create ourselves anew, to shrug off the baggage of the past, open ourselves up to the possibility of the moment and take action to create an incredible future.

response-ability

taking responsibility for our actions in nothing more than paying attention to what we see, hear, touch (external stimuli) and then react to the best of our ability. (response-ability). taking response ability seriously is important in many ways. when we go to see our doctors we are temporarily employing them to use their response-ability to assess our physical or mental needs. but it is our response-ability to make right choices every day ultimately determines if we flourish or perish?

hey this is funny: 
if we train ourselves to get fast at making good responses we could call it response-ajility! training our minds to make the right choice time after time in quick succession.

can't vs won't

do you remember when you were a child and asked "can i go to the bathroom" and the answer was not yes or no but rather a correction? because the proper way to ask is "may i go to the bathroom".
these distinctions are important.
bearing this in mind, consider how we are likely to speak when we are on a diet. one might say "oh i can't eat one of those frosted doughnuts. i'm on a diet!". but this is stinkin' thinkin'! because fact is, we can eat the doughnut (or whatever) if we want to...our mouths can chew, right?
when we say can't we are denying ourselves a pleasure we may think we deserve. and eventually we will build-up resentments which will culminate in a splurge or eat-fest or worse the end of our eating program.
the place we want to be in body/mind/spirit is to say "i won't eat that doughnut and further more, i don't want that doughnut. because my own good health is very important to me." or even "i respect myself too much to eat that doughnut". no denial there! just self empowerment, awareness, personal responsibility.
try it!

the obesity factor & stigmatization

for me, coming to terms with the fact that i am actually obese has help me begin to deal with my current weight in realistic terms. i started by looking up the ugly word OBESITY online. then i began to appreciate some of the complexities of the problem that i had been ignoring in the past. i was interested to know that: Obesity is stigmatized in much of the modern world, though it was widely perceived as a symbol of wealth and fertility at other times in history, and still is in some parts of the world. A person who is stigmatized possesses a weight that leads to a devalued social identity, and is often ascribed stereotypes or other labels denoting a perceived deviance which can lead to prejudice and discrimination. Common, “weight-based”, stereotypes are that obese persons are lazy, lack self-discipline, and have poor willpower, but also possess defects of intelligence and character.

"the bacchanal is over"

while speaking with my new (unbeknownst to her) mentor, who is about 80 now and freely speaks her mind, i was told on no uncertain terms that i was "too round" and "unhealthy". Then she moved in and almost whispered into my ear, "You've had a pretty good go of it! but look at you now, and if you don't make some kind of change in your diet and exercise where will you be when your 60?" She raised her eyebrow in a knowing way and then said,"For you... the Bacchanal is over!".

 "well!" i thought to myself, "that's quite a bold thing to say. and it's true!"
it suddenly struck me like a bag of bricks that what she was saying was true! my physical ailments were bound to start popping up as i age, and those ailments will only be complicated by my increasing morbid obesity. it was time to make some positive changes in my awful habits.

it was in that moment i decided that i would change! this was the beginning of a new me. a sensible me. a healthier me.
i'd start improving my health immediately. i'd discontinue my use of alcohol. unlike food, i don't need THAT to survive i rationed. it's would be a very clear and simple change. ending the bacchanal would be a sobering experience. no more happy-hour drink specials, accompanied by happy hour foods, which often lead to post-happy-hour binging, which could ultimately leads to feelings of guilt and self-loathing, followed by more drinking+eating and a sort of sluggish hang-over the next day that would not be conducive to an early morning walk, or swim or any other types of healthy exursion.

so be it! the bacchanal is over!

finding the balance

recently, when i was "home" visiting family for the holidays, i experienced some emotional upsets. it seems that i am still so sensitive about certain trigger issues after all these years. when talking to a brother later on about my experiences, suggested that i needed to address these unresolved emotional issues in an unusual way: by losing weight. he reasoned that getting my weight into balance may help resolve the other mind/spirit issues. this is something i never considered before. is my body out of balance because of the mind/spirit issues? or is my mind/spirit out of balance because of the body imbalance? just as in making adjustments to the colors on a painting, changing one thing changes everything else, perhaps making a few corrections in one or two areas can help bring the whole into correctness.

the "hoarder mentality"

in america today we are taught from a very early age that the more you have the better you are: more money=success. we were raised and live in the advertising age. fancy cars, huge burgers, the newest fashions, the biggest houses are all the symbols of success. it's no wonder that our culture is the first to develop a a thing called compulsive hoarding. although researchers have only recently begun to study hoarding, according to the mayo clinic, "It is not clear whether "compulsive" hoarding is a separate, isolated disorder, or rather a symptom of another condition, such as OCD".
like obesity, this is a complicated issue. but one thing is clear, there is a growing need in our society to have more. because not having enough is a sign of weakness. could these concepts be the under-pinnings of some people's desire to eat more, as if they cant get enough?
compulsive hoarding and compulsive eating are related enough for me to wonder about my insatiable desire to eat. does my compulsive eating attempt to fill the same empty hole inside me that compulsive hoarding fills? i am not an expert, but i do know that it sometimes feels that way.
for years i have said, "most people struggle to have more. but i struggle to have less".  and it's true, it is a struggle to have less. i live simply and believe in the power of austerity. as i am beginning to come to terms with my over-weight reality, i wonder if it would be possible for me to transfer my approach to "having less" to one of "eating less"?

the body+mind+spirit component

i am currently carrying 50 pounds of extra weight on my body (maybe 50x2).
you and i can see that easily in this photo taken just a few months ago.
but why? carrying this much extra weight can't possibly serve me in any way. can it? current studies show that the social stigma that is attached to overweight is incredibly negative. fat people are often considered to be lazy, sloppy and out of control. but the issue is more complex than first meets the eye. no one wants to be fat. but so many are!

most people of my size and age have been battling their weight for their entire lives. there are no easy answers. if there were, everyone would be thin and seemingly fabulous.

my prediction is that my "body weight" issues are inextricably associated with "spirit weight" and "mind weight" and therefore to achieve balance in one area, one needs to achieve balance in all three.

i recently saw an excellent film that introduces some of these concepts called, The Gift of Diabetes. if you are interested in making positive changes in your life and find your true passion, take the time to watch this film.

overveiw

"fifty pounds to passion" is an process of elimination to reveal the core essence of life. it is to be the summation of of various concepts that i am exploring to find the balance between body, mind and spirit.