you may think it's odd to see this post on a blog that has been so steadfastly focused on health and nutrition, but actually it is not too far fetched. because you can't change who you are forever by willpower and words alone. the only way you can make a long-lasting, substantial transformation is by changing how you think and feel from the inside. if you "hate the whole world and think it is ganging up on you" then it is, but you can "love the whole world and feel is working in your favor" and it is! you can say to yourself "i hate myself, this diet will never work... i'll just gain it back" or you can say: "i am worthy of love. i love myself! i am going to take care of myself just as i would help an innocent little child. i will make good food the eat that is healthy and satisfying and i will enjoy it to the fullest, knowing that ultimately being healthy today is the first step to being healthy every day. i am going to succeed because i am worthy of a healthy, sexy, feel-good body and no one can keep me from having one but me!"
saying "be in the moment, be in the now" is very well and good,
but it is not a roadmap to how to do it. how to do it is still a mystery.
louise hay lays it out like apples, peaches and pears on a golden kitchen table flooded with golden light. she teaches, gently, how to think. how to forgive and how to heal.
these things are hard for most to comprehend. i was for me.
but louise shows the way. this is just one of many of her magical, accessible recordings.
don't judge, just listen. give it a chance. it works!
i had done everything i could think of to beat obesity, lentils, veggies, turmeric, garlic, no sugar or flour (or at least that much) and i even got a food coach/nutritionist. i wrote a frickin' blog about it: what i ate, how i ate, what i drank and what i could no longer drink. i juiced, i walked, i swam, i sweat and all along the way pouring my little heart out, every win! every failure.... and I LOST 30LBS....S L O W L Y! and then one day the thought of keeping it all up, endlessly forever overtook me with hopelessness. the binges started small and infrequent, but increased in number and severity.
My dear friend Lynn. An inspiration in so many ways.
AND all the while i would talk to my dear friend (Lynn) on the phone, who was also struggling with her own food issues 2000 miles away. she was "raw" when i first met her, then vegan and then "mcdougall"(https://www.drmcdougall.com/health/education/free-mcdougall-program/). we talked about everything and laughed and cried at our successes and failures.
a year later she started talking about "bright line eating" and this woman named Susan Peirce Thompson. i was skeptical. this friend seemed so much more capable of maintaining rigid food regiments than i was. when she described the program to me it thought she was on to the next crazy solution that would come and go. but she kept on talking and i kept on listening and eventually i began to understand that this was not a diet plan, it was a life plan that could help me become what i so desperately wanted, needed, to become: healthy, thin and free. TODAY is my second day on the program.
i feel great. but more importantly i feel confident that this IS DOABLE! something i never thought i would ever say.
AMAZINGLY, today (on DAY 2 of BRIGHT LINE EATING), i am already re-booting my 50 POUNDS TO PASSION blog. here you will see all the things i tried and all the things that failed, not because the don't work, but because even tho i was eating all the right stuff, i was eating too much of it, too often and without control.
i may only on day 2! and you may laugh. you are welcome to laugh, "let's see how long his enthusiasm lasted this time!". but this program will work for me and i will become: HAPPY, THIN & FREE!
i have been struggling to get back on track. falling off the health wagon with a pizza here and some toast there has really screwed me up. having lost the weight, and then re-gaining some back, i really FEEL the difference. in every step and in how i move and think. part of the fall comes in letting coffee slip back into the equation. this is easy to do, as many diet websites encourage coffee as a good choice to drink and some even suggest it has weight loss and insulin-stability factors. but! i have noticed that when i drink coffee in the morning, i do not drink a green juice. it is one or the other, as they really don't work well together. and missing out on the green juice is a bad way to start the day. coffee is sort of a false start, giving quick (nervous) energy instead of the slow sustained energy my body learns to crave.
here's some news i found on green juicing:
Green Juice
Green juices are a bit different than fruit and non-green vegetable
juices in that they are rich in chlorophyll and low in sugar.
Chlorophyll is a magical biomolecule, which allows plants to absorb
energy from light. Yes, I know how COOL is that. Therefore,
chlorophyll is HIGHLY energetic, which is why it is such a valuable
supplement to our diet since most all foods are completely VOID of any
life energy at all! Yes, if the food has been cooked, or has been manufactured, it is a DEAD food. Chlorophyll’s ability to make us buzz is not the only thing it’s good for though. With
a molecular composition very similar to hemoglobin, chlorophyll helps
to purify the blood, build red blood cells, detoxify and heal the body,
not to mention provide us with a quick source of energy. In
addition, green juices often contain powerful detoxifying agents such as
cilantro, which have even been shown to impact heavy metal toxicity.
Therefore, the GREENER the BETTER – richer in nutrients, antioxidants,
and cleansing properties.
we all have our own reasons for losing extra weight and getting healthier. here are a few of mine: 1. having more energy to do the things i love. 2. clearer thinking in an unclogged mind 3. boost of confidence. 4. improved self awareness. 5. clothes fit better, feel better, and look better. 6. the ability to join friends on hikes and physical activities. 7. correct blood sugar levels, blood pressure levels. 8. more fun at doctors office when getting health reports. 9. knowing about nutrition is cool. 10. improved sex life. 11. sharing "how i did it" stories with friends and strangers. 12. more flirt-ability. 13. enjoying the changing scenes of nature on my daily walks. 14. shopping for clothes and food becomes and adventure. 15. improved self-esteem, self confidence and self worth. 16. relieving family and friends worry about my health issues. 17. the knowing that i am respecting my body as a temple. 18. being an example of health for others 19. dancing the tango is more fun when your thinner. 20. knowing that discipline is an important part of life. 21. not limiting myself: discovering new things and going to new places. 22. more open the possibility of being loved because i love myself. 23. renewing my fabulousness factor. 24. fitting into my seat on an international flight to somewhere edgy. 25. being the best i can be just because i can!
reasons for staying overweight:
1. the comfort of staying the same. 2. the ease of being invisible socially. 3. the glorious feeling of being out of control. 4. fitting in with mainstream america who eats too much too often. 5. i won't intimidate anyone with my good looks. 6. because ice cream tastes so good at night 7. cheap bad food is every where and so it's so easy to eat. 8. i have a good excuse for not being happy. 9. i enjoy beating myself up on a daily basis. 10. being over weight, and out of shape is easy.
Your
journey will be much lighter and easier if you don’t try to carry your
entire past and future around with you. Take a break. Let go of your
obsession with yesterday’s struggles and tomorrow’s to-do list, and
simply enjoy the beauty of what’s right here, right now. Sometimes you
have to stop thinking that some new richness will fulfill you, so you
can fully experience the richness that's already yours.
leaning in the direction of your goal, is a choice we make 10 times a day.
sometimes i don't feel like being on a "diet". i don't feel like being perfect. but i also don't feel like going back to where i was, heavy and lethargic. in these cases, i am learning a new technique called "leaning". instead of asking what i should eat to "stay on my diet", i ask "which way would i like to lean today, toward a healthy body that functions better that the one i am in today, or towards the unhealthy body, the one i had before?" framing my decision in this light feels more like a nudge in the right direction, rather than a black and white ultimatum. i use my imagination and visualize the way i want to go. in this case, using the image above, do i want to go to the left or to the right? the action i take today determines that. but it's not like i have to cross a finish line or win a prize, just move in that direction. and i know that if i move in that direction most of the time, eventually i will get to that place.
well, i may be onto something here, as this is the third blog post on the same topic: laziness. in conversation with a friend today i was discussing the topic in the context of not only food but life. about being tired and the times when one doesn't feel like choosing the right foods and then have to chop and prepare them or when one doesn't feel like going for a walk and she reminded me that there is so much joy in these processes. for instance, taking a walk and noticing that what was no more than a little seedling yesterday was a flower today. these simple pleasures, that are the food of life, are lost when we choose instead to stay home and sleep or spend just a little longer checking our facebook profile updates like status. and then she said something that may stick with me for the rest of my life, she said, (in regard to whole living practices)
"health is my first job. just like a bird needs to go out a catch a worm to eat in the morning."
i love that: "it's my first job". my first job is to take the action required to keep my body+mind+spirit in good working order so that i may truly be present and serve in some way on this planet. you have to work for it.that's very different from being lazy. in our culture we are taught that you earn money (or acquire money) and then you are entitled to buy things. the more you have the more you can get. you can have what you want, pre-fab food, a sedentary lifestyle,and mindless consumption. why? because you can pay for it! to have stuff is to prove you are worth stuff. more stuff = more self worth. really? i could get into the whole hoarding culture thing here, or obesity/self worth thing here, but that's not really the point. it's simpler than that:
matthew 6/26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Amanda Sizemore, farmer, handling the crops that survived devastating rains.
i don't think about faith much. haven't used the word in many years. i don't tend to say things like "ya gotta have faith!". i always thought that was more of a christian-thing, referring to of course to "faith in god". but as i have considered what keeps me from meeting my personal goals and staying on track with my health, i have decided that it is not lack of willpower or lack of desire, but rather a lack of faith.
change is difficult. even when it is change for the good. even when it is self selected change. changing the way you think about food, how you prepare it how much you eat and when and where. and focusing daily on gratitude and goals and breathing and walking. all change for the good. and the results are good too! the slimming effect is good. more energy is good. but, alas! sometimes exhausting. i begin to wonder "how much longer can i keep this up? will my dreams come true? is it all worth it?"
and this, my peeps, is where faith comes in. faith in myself. not faith in some far away place or person or idea. faith in being alive today. faith in knowing that good things will sprout from the seeds that i labor to plant today. faith like a farmer has faith!
when i went looking for a "faith" image to accompany this blog post, i was afraid of what i might find, and all my fears came true. it was mostly churchy-imagery with hookey slogans attached. but when i changed my search to "faith in where you're going" it lead me to the image you see above and to the story of two farmers, Jeremy and Amanda Sizemore who know about faith:
Storms swamped their fields with rain that sometimes totaled 3 or
more inches in a day. In May alone, the area absorbed a record-breaking 9
inches. So much rain makes it logistically difficult to get in the fields to
plant crops, and it creates a perfect environment for pests,
fungi and other diseases. The Sizemores estimate their revenue came up
about 50 percent below expectations because of lost crops. But they never quit, and they plan to come back bigger next year. “Farming is more about having faith in what you're doing than having
control over it,”said Jeremy, 35. “If you ain't got faith, you ain't
going to last long.”
so as i move back into my body and eating the right stuff that nourishes me, "the whole me" rather than feeding my diseases, i have to give thanks to my faith for keeping me on track. because just as mr. sizemore says,"If you ain't got faith, you ain't
going to last long.”
for the rest of the story about the sizemores go here.
"you've used all your brilliance and made the best choices you can and still, everything you've done up til now has gotten you exactly where you are. is that where you want to be?"
i weighed too much, and although i enjoyed life most of the time, there we often moments of sadness and helplessness. i needed to make some drastic changes. but how?
about a month into my 50 Pounds to Passion journey i met someone. her name is suzanne lawrence. in our initial conversation at a christmas party we talked about energy, change, nutrition and purpose. it turns out each of us was embarking upon our own unique paths, mine toward wellness and passion and hers toward sharing her knowledge of nutrition and whole being. we fit.
about half way through our a second meeting at a raw food restaurant where we ate fruit stuffed dates and hummus platters, i realized that accepting help along the way, inspite of how difficult it may be, was going to be a key to my success. i needed to see and do things in a very different way that i had seen and done them in the past. then, suzanne offered her services to coach me.
i didn't like the word "coach" at first. i thought it was too new-agy. i thought the word "nutritionist" might feel better. but suzanne insisted on coach and so that's what we went with. now, many weeks later, i can tell you that "coaching" is exactly what suzanne has provided. in addition to give-n-take talks about life goals, nutritional needs, and personal relationships, suzanne spent time with me to show me HOW to food shop, HOW to cook and WHAT to eat. this had made all the difference. grumpy-old stubburn me had to loosen my grip on what i thought i knew and allow myself to learn something new.
let me say this: it helps to have a coach.
accepting the coaching guidance and friendship of suzanne lawrence has made all the difference on my path to recovery. if you are serious about attaining wellness, do yourself a favor, seek out those around you who are already on this path: ask for their guidance, do what they do. it works.
now that i have lost 25 lbs, and am feeling like a different person from when i first started 3 months ago, i finally feel like "this is going to happen". taking the slow route has had it's share of challenges. but like the turtle and the hare, it's how things turn out in the end that matters. on this illustrious occassion, i thought this would be the right time to re-consider the original goal of this blog and the intention behind it: FINDING PASSION.
in conjunction to the efforts to lose weight, i have also been working on the other to realms of the equation: mind+spirit. the 50 POUNDS concept is to let go of the stuff (mental and spiritual junk) that is clinging to me and that i am still clinging to. as i have let go of the unforgiving idea worthlessness, i have also found it helpful to be open to the concept of vulnerability. accepting myself for who i am, knowing that i am not perfect, is the first step to accepting others for who they are, knowing that they are not perfect either. this is a great weight off my mind and spirit. and just like the new patterns for eating, this takes constant adjustment to begin establishing new patterns of thought.
berne brown's ted talk is one of the most inspiring videos i have watched on the topic of vulnerability. in fact, some of her ideas on vulnerability were instrumental in leading me to create the 50 POUNDS TO PASSION blog.
as i continue this journey i am learning a great deal about nutrition and the power of movement. i am changing what i eat, even though i have regular slips, and beginning to understand how important it is to change what i think as well. i have a feeling that i can no longer afford to be vague about what i want in life. just trudging forward in what is a "perfectly fine world" is not getting it anymore. it's time to zero in on my true hopes and dreams. yes i want to have a healthy body, but what do i want for my mind and spirit? what are my goals?
from an early age we are told "you can do anything!". remember the inspirational posters in the halls at middle and high school: shoot for the stars! and then life begins and maybe you go to collage and you get a job and you have some adventures and some success and you are working for free to build your portfolio and the next thing you know (or i should say, the next thing I know) i'm 50. was i a success? what did i do and what did i not do? but more importantly, what am i going to do next? who am i going to be next? this is where the work begins. here is where the opportunity begins. where do i go from here: i begin with gratitude. i reflect daily on all the beauty and wealth and health i have. but i must also begin to focus on legacy each day. what i want to accomplish next and what i want to give back. getting clear on my goals and dreams clears the fog of indecision and self doubt. if my total goal is for body+mind+spirit balance, i need to take the time to sit down and get clear on these things.
(below is a tony robbins video at TED Talks, which is not his best, but covers some of the topics i've discussed here- it's just 20 minutes)
To lose fat, water is the key, apart from the proper diet choice and exercise. How does drinking water help in fat loss?
It curbs hunger:
Water is a natural appetite suppressant. Insufficient fluid can lead
to over eating. You brain does not differentiate between hunger and
thirst. If there there is a slight dehydration the thirst mechanism may
be mistaken for hunger and one may eat when the body is actually
craving for water. In another word, when you think you are hungry, your
body may in fact telling you that you are thirsty!
As most food
contains some water, if you don't drink enough water, you may be
subconsciously driven to eat more to gain the necessary water supply and
as a result, you gain more calories and more weight!
Water makes you feel full. Because it is filling and
calorie free, water is part of the solutions when it comes to weight
loss and maintenance. Water takes up room in your stomach, making you
feel full. This means you’ll eat less and feel less hungry.
It replaces sugary drinks:
A half-cup of fruit juice contains between 45 and 80 calories. Sodas,
sugary drinks, shakes are all contain calories. By drinking them, you
would be adding considerable number of calories. On the other hand water
has zero calories. So, to replace sugary drinks and cut down on your
calories, keep a glass of water in your hand and sip it instead of
grabbing a mixed drink or any other type of drink.
Water boosts your metabolism. The findings are reported in the December issue, 2003 of The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism.
The researchers Michael Boschmann, MD, and colleagues from Berlin's
Franz-Volhard Clinical Research Center tracked energy expenditures among
seven men and seven women who were healthy and not overweight. The
subjects, after drinking approximately 17 ounces of water, increases the
rate of burning calories by 30% within the time frame of 30-40 minutes.
knowing i am on the right path in my head is one thing. knowing it in my body is another. i struggle sometimes, so i am dedicating today's blog post to the ideas i need to internalize. i am about to begin the process, a new one for me, of quieting my mind. some call this meditation. i will call it my "practice". please share with me and others exeriences you have had with meditation in the comments area below. and if you haven't done so already, join our community by signing up for email at the top of the column on the right. peace!
Here I am on a hiking trail in the Anza Borrego Desert.
well, today has been good. lost a pound (yea!) and took a walk. i am sticking with the program, knowing that even with occasional mis-steps, that i am on the right path. i have discovered that when i tell people how much i have lost (which is now 20 lbs of fat... and how much i've gained which is 5 pounds of muscle), they are likely to tell me about some miracle diet that they have heard about where people "lose weight faster"! i appreciate their concern and thank them. but the fact of the matter is, although i sometimes wish for faster weight-loss too, my game plan is and has always been to lose weight s-l-o-w-l-y. as far as i have been able to tell, the most people, who have lost the most weight, and kept it off for the longest time, have all lost their weight slowly.
losing weight slowly means not starving the body, not shocking it in way that might seem like there is a famine going on, but rather to feed it the proper nutrition it is craving, reducing the toxic influx of pre-fab foods, and exercising more. this is what i call the "slow diet".
nobody, and i mean nobody, wants to do a "slow diet". trust me, this is a very unpopular idea that does not jell with the fast food, instant gratification world we live in. so be it. this is my path, and i am glad i finally found it. somehow it works with the other parts of my wabi-sabi life very well. it is the path un-taken. care to join me?
IN NINE WEEKS OF SELECT NUTRITION AND REGULAR EXERCISE I HAVE TURNED MY A1C BLOOD TEST LEVEL FROM A 7.8 (WHICH IS VERY HIGH) TO A 6.3 (WHICH IS CONSIDERED BETTER THAN IDEAL FOR DIABETICS). MY BLOOD PRESSURE IS NOW NORMAL, I HAVE LOST 17 LBS. OF FAT AND GAINED 5 LBS OF MUSCLE. PLUS: I HAVE MORE ENERGY THAN EVER.
I'M DOING THIS!
when you're first diagnosed with type 2 diabetes your whole world sort of melts before your eyes. you know nothing is going to be the same. there are shots to take, blood drops to extract and glucose gadgets to read. you feel very alone.
(and maybe a little sorry for yourself.) the new world you are about to enter includes regular doctor visits, bizarre physical ailments which can morph into really serious medical emergencies if not handled quickly and properly and a host of informational websites that look like something out of a 5 grade "how to was your hands" film playing on an old school projector. in other words, there is nothing sexy about being diabetic.
there is so much information out there, all with contradictory advice, that in the beginning it just might seem easier to bury your head in the sand, take your pills and carry on with life unchanged- except for maybe swapping sweet&low for sugar in your coffee in the morning. feeling sorry for yourself is easy! you've got a disease that no-one can cure and is a lead cause of early death in this country. why bother? of course, you know that you're supposed to "cut down on carbs", but that like "cutting down on booze or cigarettes", it's nice to talk about but very difficult to actually do.
here's the good news: there is one person who can help you get rid of diabetes, you! and not by "cutting down" on carbs here and there and trying to eat a certain pyramid or portion allocations. no. the way to do it is to realize that this is a matter of life and death and that you no longer can eat certain foods at all! in a way having a chronic condition makes things very easy. hopefully the option to take massive action becomes abundantly clear in a flash. hello? cakes, breads, white rice, potatoes and all processes foods are no longer a part of my regular life. (period) what's left is a new adventure in eating, one you could never get to know when you were infatuated with fats and deep-fried and processed foods. what's left is fruits and veggies and yogurt and fish. what's left is nutrition! action! exercise and passion!
IT ALL STARTS WHEN YOU DECIDE THAT IT'S TIME TO TAKE MASSIVE ACTION TO IMPROVE BOTH YOUR MENTAL AND PHYSICAL HEALTH!
learning to love yourself means learning to nourish yourself. making soup from scratch is a time honored tradition for "sharing the love". make time in your busy day to do something that's good for you, take a walk, breathe deep, really connect with someone, and make soup.
