Is setting goals, setting yourself up for failure?

Just when i began questioning the whole process of setting and being side-tracked by goals i came across this blog post by Dr Mark Hyman.

Eat better, exercise more, learn more, love more, love better, be a better son, father, friend, be a better doctor, reach more people, heal the planet, end obesity, starvation, and global warming – ARRRRRGGHHHHHHH!!
It’s enough to make me want to stay in bed and watch movies on iTunes. How can I do all of this? How can I wake up and figure out what do to first, second, or third? How can I achieve even one of these things?  I actually fail all the time.  There is absolutely no way I can achieve my goals.
Our culture is awash with endless pressure to do more, do better, be skinnier, be richer, be happier, be fitter, and be healthier.  We are offered endless lists of what do to, how to achieve more, reach our dreams, lose weight, attain the five steps to immortality, find the seven ways to stop wrinkles, or how to lose 100 pounds in ten days.
We go for these promises because we have this innate yearning to grow, to evolve, to improve, and to be better.
I am in the change business, the transformation business.  I want people to feel better, live well, be happy, be awake, be alive, and to be healthy.  I have to set goals for myself, and I help others to set goals for themselves.
Unfortunately, this leads to inevitable disappointment because we can never reach our goals.  And once we do reach some desired result there will be another goal that will grab our attention.  It is hard to do, but I have found that if you give up your goals magic happens. (go to the blog post here)

maintainence

it's been a few months now, and i have lost 30lbs, improved my well-being and had a lot of fun along the way. i started with protein smoothies, moved to fish and veggies, began walking, got a juicier, lengthened my walks, started using the juicer and did a lot of research on setting goals and quieting the mind. i started packing my own healthy lunches for work, making big batches of lentil soup to eat when ever i didn't know what else to eat and i began to have a re-newed confidence in myself and my ability to make positive changes to my lifestyle habits that with last a lifetime.

today, i am on a brief vacation away from home, so of course their are many disruptions to my usual patterns. i also celebrated a birthday. but i am pleased to say that i have done so mindfully.
not to my usual strict codes of conduct, but with loving gentle self compassion. bending some of the rules, some of the time, while knowing that the path to health remains a gentle slope, is a good way to let your body and ego mind know that the beautiful world we live in with all the complexity of dark chocolate, and coffee, and a perfect slice of pizza on the street is still there to be enjoyed. (without guilt).

the time and effort i have put into improving my body, mind and spirit, is not lost when i break from my rules for myself. rather, my long term goals are very much in sight as i take little detours along the way.

the future and food

to celebrate my birthday, it flew north to spend some time with a friend in the bay area, land of the original fruits and nuts. i'm enjoying my stay. people seem smarter here. more open here. more connected here. so it does not surprise me that they are ahead of the curve on food consciousness too. every body up here knows exactly what i am talking about when i go off on probiotics and integrated nutrition. even my friend's healthy young son, a berkley student, was talking about white fat cells vs. white fat cells and how it relates to weight loss. it seems the next generation will have a whole new wealth of information about body science to help guide their nutritional choices (thanks in part by all the research that has gone into space travel)

the future of food is changing. experts are predicting that by 2030 nearly half of americans will be obese. the fat will get fatter and the strong will get stronger. it's a matter of educating ourselves, changing life habits, and demanding healthier, whole food options from our schools, stores and eating establishments.

30 pounds to passion (i'm getting there!)

i have now lost 30 pounds, turned my diabetes around and have perfect blood pressure!

to day is my birthday! i started this blog and my new improved 50 POUNDS TO PASSION lifestyle just a little over 3 months ago and have now i have now dropped 30 pounds, turned my diabetes around and have perfect blood pressure! the first thing i see when i look in a mirror or reflective glass window when i am walking down the street is no longer my big belly protruding from my body, but someone i barely recognize: the new improved me!

i am so happy to know that there are a few individuals out there who are following me on this journey and even joining me in it. it pleases me to know that i have inspired others to take action towards a healthy, more passionate life. but i really do want to reach out to more people out there who are suffering now the way i was just a few months ago. feeling hopeless that the medical community's idea of fixing diabetes and obesity is just prescription drugs and lighthearted encouragement to "exercise". i want to reach those people. can you help me?

for my birthday gift today, would you forward this link to 3 people you might know who could use a dose of improved health in body+mind+spirit: 

https://www.50poundstopassion.com 

thanks for being here. thanks for caring. and thanks for sharing!

juicing for smarties

before and after: home grown sprouts, ginger, turmeric, carrots, bok choy, beets, cabbage, kale.

juicing for smarties? yes! juicing is decidedly NOT for dummies, although it's the easiest thing in the world to do. even though i am a novice, and i am sure that there are many places online that can tell you a million things you ought to know about juicing, this is my blog, and this is how i roll:

1. go shopping just for veggies. don't pick up anything if it's not a fruit, veggie or some kind of root. just for today, be a purist!

2. buy a rainbow of colors. carrots, beets, cilantro, ginger, turmeric, bok choy. not only is it pretty, it's good for you.

3. don't be a sissy! go big or go home. buy a lot! see just how far 40 bucks can go when you are just buying greens. it's amazing!

4. have you ever heard of "shop & chop". this is how it's done: when you get home chop up all the leafy greens in a size that fits easily into your juicer and toss them in a dry plastic bag so they are ready to go when you are. (leave the carrots whole or cut the the long way so you can use them to help push things thru if needed)

5. gather together or buy various sized glass jars. i like mason jars... but also check out your local asian market place as they sometimes have cute glass jars with interesting lids at a good price! you're going to want to make more juice than just one serving at a time and the individual jars make it easy to store and to take with.

6. fire up the juicer and start feeding it the goods! it's best to rotate the leafy and meaty items with watery items to help flush the juice thru the machine and avoid clogging. make enough juice to last a day or two. go nuts.

7. pour the juice into the pretty jars all the way to the top, leaving as little air as possible. (you don't want the juice to oxidize). store in fridge.

8. clean the messy and then progress. that is, clean the juicer right away. it makes cleaning it so much faster and better.

9. top off a nice glass with the freshly made juice. take a big swig and enjoy the sensation of goodness, then take a pix to show-off to your juicing pals.

10. enjoy the rest of the day knowing that you have done something good for yourself. you have prepared several power meals the will nourish your body, mind and spirit! congratulate yourself!

wabi-sabi weight loss

Wabi-sabi is not only a style, but a Japanese philosophy based in Zen and built on three principles: nothing lasts, nothing ends, and nothing is perfect. “Wabi” means a deliberate humility, a lack of materialism, and a deep connection with the environment. “Sabi” is different. It literally translates as “bloom of time.” Taken together, Wabi-Sabi is a worldview that perceives beauty in roughness, elegance in imperfection, and serenity in the natural process of decay. Wabi-Sabi is homespun and homemade, the chip on the lip of a pot, the patina on a copper box, the new colors and textures objects take on as they age. More than just aesthetics, wabi-sabi extends into all parts of life. It’s a philosophy that believes enlightenment comes with the acceptance of material impermanence.

So how does Wabi Sabi come into weight loss? For me, calming down and accepting things (and myself) for what they are helps me stay focused on what is true. Thoughtless commercial food consumption is an extension of materialism (and probably hoarding). It is that haunting need to have more. To have the bright shiny thing that comes in a package: a big mac, a snickers, a deep-fried happy hour special that comes piled high on a plate. Wabi sabi is not like that. Wabi Sabi is quiet. It is humble, like an ordinary apple, a bowl of black beans or a handful of green beans. Wabi Sabi is pure, and intentional, and imperfect.

asking for help along the way

one day i had to ask myself: 

"you've used all your brilliance and made the best choices you can and still, everything you've done up til now has gotten you exactly where you are. is that where you want to be?" 

i weighed too much, and although i enjoyed life most of the time, there we often moments of sadness and helplessness. i needed to make some drastic changes. but how?

about a month into my 50 Pounds to Passion journey i met someone. her name is suzanne lawrence. in our initial conversation at a christmas party we talked about energy, change, nutrition and purpose. it turns out each of us was embarking upon our own unique paths, mine toward wellness and passion and hers toward sharing her knowledge of nutrition and whole being. we fit.

about half way through our a second meeting at a raw food restaurant where we ate fruit stuffed dates and hummus platters, i realized that accepting help along the way, inspite of how difficult it may be, was going to be a key to my success. i needed to see and do things in a very different way that i had seen and done them in the past. then, suzanne offered her services to coach me.

i didn't like the word "coach" at first. i thought it was too new-agy. i thought the word "nutritionist" might feel better. but suzanne insisted on coach and so that's what we went with. now, many weeks later, i can tell you that "coaching" is exactly what suzanne has provided. in addition to give-n-take talks about life goals, nutritional needs, and personal relationships, suzanne spent time with me to show me HOW to food shop, HOW to cook and WHAT to eat. this had made all the difference. grumpy-old stubburn me had to loosen my grip on what i thought i knew and allow myself to learn something new.

let me say this: it helps to have a coach.

accepting the coaching guidance and friendship of suzanne lawrence has made all the difference on my path to recovery. if you are serious about attaining wellness, do yourself a favor, seek out those around you who are already on this path: ask for their guidance, do what they do. it works.

find out more about suzanne at her new website: followingnaturesway.com

mindfulness

Being mindful in the moment is the greatest gift we can give ourselves. Being mindful of the gifts we have been given and the love that surrounds us, is the first step in knowing that we are enough and we have enough.

Mindful eating has the powerful potential to transform people’s relationship to food and eating, to improve overall health, body image, relationships and self-esteem. Mindful eating involves many components such as:

• learning to make choices in beginning or ending a meal based on awareness of hunger and satiety cues;
• learning to identify personal triggers for mindless eating, such as emotions, social pressures, or certain foods;
• valuing quality over quantity of what you’re eating;
• appreciating the sensual, as well as the nourishing, capacity of food;
• feeling deep gratitude that may come from appreciating and experiencing food

Mindful eating draws substantially on the use of mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness helps focus our attention and awareness on the present moment, which in turn, helps us disengage from habitual, unsatisfying and unskillful habits and behaviors. Engaging in mindful eating meditation practices on a regular basis can help us discover a far more satisfying relationship to food and eating than we ever imagined or experienced before. A different kind of nourishment often emerges, the kind that offers satisfaction on a very deep emotional level.

For more info on this topic go to: 

juice "feast" / liver detox

liver detox tea

where have i been? detoxing my liver.

i am on day four of a liver detox program which includes, juicing a rainbow of veggies, drinking pure water and drinking detox tea day and night. cleansing your liver is one of the most important things you can do to improve your overall health as it means inducing the liver to purge fats, old cholesterol deposits, gallstones, poisons, drug residues, and other toxic waste. While you do this, you also clean out other vital organs including your blood and intestines. there are many benefits to regular liver detoxification. Following are just a few:

Weight loss and reduced cellulite – Improving liver function can help with weight loss as your body will start to release liquids and fat that has attached to excess toxins.

Better cardiovascular function – The structural position of the liver as a bridge between the returning blood from the digestive system and the lower part of the body to the heart makes the liver an important organ for the health of the heart. It is especially important to keep the liver clean if cardiovascular health is a risk factor because a weakened and swollen liver can obstruct the venous blood flow to the heart causing heart palpitations or even heart attack.

Improved Libido – Even a mildly sluggish liver can seriously affect your energy level as well as your libido. 

Improved immune function – Detoxing the liver strenthens your body‟s fight against harmful (i.e. cancer) cells and helps to generate healthy cells, resulting in less illness and disease.

Improved digestion, cleaner blood and clearer skin – detoxifying your liver helps to cleanse mucous, congestion, fermentation and inflammation in your digestive tract resulting in improved intestinal health, cleaner blood as well as clearer skin.

Improved lifestyle – any form of detoxification can help to reform you lifestyle addictions for substances such as sugar, salt, high glycemic carbohydrates, alcohol, junk foods, nicotine, etc.

Fewer aches and pains – by reducing the liver‟s toxic buildups, health problems such as fatigue, arthritis and joint pain, as well as other chronic diseases are minimized. The theory is that cleansing the liver with specific foods and beverages will clean these buildups from the liver, thus making you feel better.

If you look after your liver, here's the list of diseases you won't get include:

• Cirrhosis
• Cancer
• Heavy metal poisoning
• Gall stones
• Diabetes
• Obesity

Cleansing your liver also cleans out other vital organs including your blood and intestines, so it actually has multiple benefits for your overall health.

(here's some info on juicers)

finding passion begins with vulnerability

now that i have lost 25 lbs, and am feeling like a different person from when i first started 3 months ago, i finally feel like "this is going to happen". taking the slow route has had it's share of challenges. but like the turtle and the hare, it's how things turn out in the end that matters. on this illustrious occassion, i thought this would be the right time to re-consider the original goal of this blog and the intention behind it: FINDING PASSION.

in conjunction to the efforts to lose weight, i have also been working on the other to realms of the equation: mind+spirit. the 50 POUNDS concept is to let go of the stuff (mental and spiritual junk) that is clinging to me and that i am still clinging to. as i have let go of the unforgiving idea worthlessness, i have also found it helpful to be open to the concept of vulnerability. accepting myself for who i am, knowing that i am not perfect, is the first step to accepting others for who they are, knowing that they are not perfect either. this is a great weight off my mind and spirit. and just like the new patterns for eating, this takes constant adjustment to begin establishing new patterns of thought.

berne brown's ted talk is one of the most inspiring videos i have watched on the topic of vulnerability.  in fact, some of her ideas on vulnerability were instrumental in leading me to create the 50 POUNDS TO PASSION blog.

eating salad is eating "raw"!

super simple salad, mixed at the table.

there is a raw food movement out there, which is good. raw food foodies are very strict about what they eat. i love to borrow from the raw food movement without getting married to it, if you know what i mean.

lots of my meals are raw, but not all. lots are vegan, but not all. this one starts with a dash of balsamic vinegar reduction, a stack of various chopped, and sliced veggies: carrot, cukes, lettuce hearts, celery, and red cabbage. then a half ripe avocado, a hand-full of fresh water cress and two freshly picked nasturtiums. a honey, vinegar and pepper oil dressing is served on the side. the salad is then dressed and tossed at will at the table.

the drink is a tart/sweet lemonade made with several whole (peeled) lemons, some wild honey and a few frozen berries blended in the blender, chilled and served cold.

love.

today is an opportunity

as i continue this journey i am learning a great deal about nutrition and the power of movement. i am changing what i eat, even though i have regular slips, and beginning to understand how important it is to change what i think as well. i have a feeling that i can no longer afford to be vague about what i want in life. just trudging forward in what is a "perfectly fine world" is not getting it anymore. it's time to zero in on my true hopes and dreams. yes i want to have a healthy body, but what do i want for my mind and spirit? what are my goals?

from an early age we are told "you can do anything!". remember the inspirational posters in the halls at middle and high school: shoot for the stars! and then life begins and maybe you go to collage and you get a job and you have some adventures and some success and you are working for free to build your portfolio and the next thing you know (or i should say, the next thing I know) i'm 50. was i a success? what did i do and what did i not do? but more importantly, what am i going to do next? who am i going to be next? this is where the work begins. here is where the opportunity begins. where do i go from here: i begin with gratitude. i reflect daily on all the beauty and wealth and health i have. but i must also begin to focus on legacy each day. what i want to accomplish next and what i want to give back. getting clear on my goals and dreams clears the fog of indecision and self doubt. if my total goal is for body+mind+spirit balance, i need to take the time to sit down and get clear on these things. 

(below is a tony robbins video at TED Talks, which is not his best, but covers some of the topics i've discussed here- it's just 20 minutes)

man in the mirror?

why bother to shop for fresh foods and eat the right stuff, take walks in the morning and learn more about nutrition? wouldn't it be easier to do what everybody else does: to eat what's convenient and stay in bed a little longer? being lazy easy. it's also easy to complain. it's easy to lament about things gone wrong or why we don't have what we think we deserve. and it's sometimes hard to be creative, to re-consider old ideas or invent new ones.

so, why write a blog? why make a short film? why paint a painting? why fall in love? all of these things require risk and possible failure. they require learning more and making mistakes and falling down and getting up again. i believe that being vulnerable is the beginning of being alive. that sharing who you truly are is the greatest gift you can give, not being the (supposedly) safe someone who sits on the side and judges. i don't want to end up being that proverbial unburned scented candle that lingers in the guest bedroom bathroom collecting dust in its cellophane wrapper. i want to be the candle that burns bright and needs to be replaced because it's all used up. time to make the change.

through this process of "50 pounds to passion", i have discovered something. i have discovered that in order to find my own passion i need to accept myself for who i am right now. i need to stop judging myself for who i am not and start loving myself for who i've become. spending time each day in gratitude is a good way to start. and knowing that in a world that is screwed up as ours is, the stronger each of us becomes in body, mind and spirit, the better chance we'll have to be supportive of a more peaceful, amazing world.

the "killing me softly" carbs

these foods will kill you if you eat too often.

TOP 10 WORST DIABETES-CAUSING "FAST CARB” FOODS

these foods help to heal your body and mind.

1. White bread, toast, bagels, English muffins, bread sticks
2. Fruit juice, soda, energy drinks and all sweetened beverages
3. Waffles, pancakes, French toast
4. Pastries, coffee cake, muffins, donuts, cupcakes, cake
5. Jams and jellies, especially those with added sugar or sweeteners.

6. Boxed breakfast cereals
7. ―Instant‖ hot cereals, including instant oatmeal
8. Tortillas; corn or white flour
9. Large portions of home fries, hash browns and other potato dishes
10. White ―minute‖ rice

Other foods to avoid, because they are high in sugar or other sweeteners, dangerous oils and/or processed flours (and low in fiber and nutrients): Snack cakes, energy bars, marshmallows, candy, flavored gelatin and pudding, commercially flavored and sweetened yogurt, potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, crackers, desserts, cookies, cake, ice cream, pie, commercially-made sweet breads and pastries

water. (+podcast)

DRINK IT!

PS:  a podcast i like: http://realweightloss.podomatic.com/ 

To lose fat, water is the key, apart from the proper diet choice and exercise. How does drinking water help in fat loss?

• It curbs hunger: Water is a natural appetite suppressant. Insufficient fluid can lead to over eating. You brain does not differentiate between hunger and thirst. If there there is a slight dehydration the thirst mechanism may be mistaken for hunger and one may eat when the body is actually craving for water. In another word, when you think you are hungry, your body may in fact telling you that you are thirsty!
  As most food contains some water, if you don't drink enough water, you may be subconsciously driven to eat more to gain the necessary water supply and as a result, you gain more calories and more weight!

• Water makes you feel full. Because it is filling and calorie free, water is part of the solutions when it comes to weight loss and maintenance. Water takes up room in your stomach, making you feel full. This means you’ll eat less and feel less hungry.
• It replaces sugary drinks: A half-cup of fruit juice contains between 45 and 80 calories. Sodas, sugary drinks, shakes are all contain calories. By drinking them, you would be adding considerable number of calories. On the other hand water has zero calories. So, to replace sugary drinks and cut down on your calories, keep a glass of water in your hand and sip it instead of grabbing a mixed drink or any other type of drink.
• Water boosts your metabolism. The findings are reported in the December issue, 2003 of The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism. The researchers Michael Boschmann, MD, and colleagues from Berlin's Franz-Volhard Clinical Research Center tracked energy expenditures among seven men and seven women who were healthy and not overweight. The subjects, after drinking approximately 17 ounces of water, increases the rate of burning calories by 30% within the time frame of 30-40 minutes.

i am worthy, grateful, mindful and strong.

knowing i am on the right path in my head is one thing. knowing it in my body is another. i struggle sometimes, so i am dedicating today's blog post to the ideas i need to internalize. i am about to begin the process, a new one for me, of quieting my mind. some call this meditation. i will call it my "practice". please share with me and others exeriences you have had with meditation in the comments area below. and if you haven't done so already, join our community by signing up for email at the top of the column on the right. peace!

still walking. (but taking the slow route)

Here I am on a hiking trail in the Anza Borrego Desert.

well, today has been good. lost a pound (yea!) and took a walk. i am sticking with the program, knowing that even with occasional mis-steps, that i am on the right path. i have discovered that when i tell people how much i have lost (which is now 20 lbs of fat... and how much i've gained which is 5 pounds of muscle), they are likely to tell me about some miracle diet that they have heard about where people "lose weight faster"! i appreciate their concern and thank them. but the fact of the matter is, although i sometimes wish for faster weight-loss too, my game plan is and has always been to lose weight s-l-o-w-l-y. as far as i have been able to tell, the most people, who have lost the most weight, and kept it off for the longest time, have all lost their weight slowly.

losing weight slowly means not starving the body, not shocking it in way that might seem like there is a famine going on, but rather to feed it the proper nutrition it is craving, reducing the toxic influx of pre-fab foods, and exercising more. this is what i call the "slow diet".

nobody, and i mean nobody, wants to do a "slow diet". trust me, this is a very unpopular idea that does not jell with the fast food, instant gratification world we live in. so be it. this is my path, and i am glad i finally found it. somehow it works with the other parts of my wabi-sabi life very well. it is the path un-taken. care to join me?

easy-breezy probioatics

If you have tried or heard of the fermented tea, kombucha, this is kind of similar, although a hundred times easier to make. Kvass is a russian fermented beverage traditionally made with beets, whey and rye bread. This simplified fruit version is whey- and grain free, and still packed with nutritious probiotic enzymes and amazing natural bubbles.

I found this wonderful recipe on the GREEN KITCHEN STORIES blog:

Fermented Fruit Kvass  
(Fermenting technique from Rebecca Wood)
1 large glass jar

Make sure to always use organic ripe fruit when fermenting.
1/4 of a large glass jar of mixed organic ripe fruit (we used fresh peaches and blackberries)
1 tbsp unpasteurized honey
1-inch fresh ginger, peeled
pure water to almost fill the jar (you get best result with filtered or mineral water)
Place fruit, honey and ginger in the jar. Add water to fill up the jar, except the top inch. You’ll need that extra space to allow pressure to build. Tightly close the jar. Place in room temperature for 2-3 days, give it a shake twice a day to prevent bacteria from forming on the surface. After 24 hours you can see fermentation bubbles. Taste your brew every day to see when it is ready, it depends on the room temperature and sugar content. It should taste sweet and tangy and the fruit look ‘cooked’. Strain the brew and drink as it is or store in the fridge for up to a week.
If you have any problems with the fermenting process, you could add whey or yeast as a starter, it could depend on the water or the honey you use. I use (scandinavian) tap water or filtered tap water.
The natural alcohol level in homemade Kvass is very very low, about 0.05%-1.0%, which means that children can drink it too.

Other Kvass Combinations:
cherry, raspberry, cardamom
apple, raisins, cinnamon
lemon, dried apricots, ginger
mango, chai spices
beet, apple, lemon balm
nectarine, camomile
blackberry, peaces, vanilla bean
dried prunes, lemon, ginger
Keep refrigerated for up to 1 week.

reconfiguring our actions to manifest a new success

in a world that's faster and faster, and where "more and more" becomes the mantra of the people, perhaps it's time to consider how we fit in and what works for us in the long run. in order to change our perception of what success looks like, we may have to change our relationship to it. in sri sri ravi shankar's 2010 blog post entitled "our connection to nature",  he talks about how ancient wisdom describes human beings as having five layers of experience: the environment, the physical body, the mind, the intuition and our self or spirit.

sri sri ravi shankar says this:

Our connection with the environment is our first level of experience, and one of the most important. If our environment is clean and positive, it has a positive impact on all the other layers of our existence. As a result, they come into balance and we experience a greater sense of peace and connection within ourselves and with others around us.

Today we live in a world where many have become greedy and want to make quick profits and achieve quick results. Their actions disrupt the ecological balance, and not only pollute the physical environment, but also stimulate negative emotions on a subtle level, within themselves and also in those around them. These negative energies expanded and compounded again and again are the root cause of much of the violence and misery in this world. Most wars and conflicts are triggered by such feelings, and result in damage to the environment, which then takes a long time to restore and repair. We need to attend to the human psyche which is the root cause of pollution, both physical and emotional. If compassion and care are kindled within our selves, they will form the basis for a deeper connection to, and care for, both others and the environment.

so! this is about taking care of ourselves and our planet on a daily basis...NOT greedily grabbing all we can and hoarding for the future. seth godin, the original and helpful voice on the new landscape of digital connection for which there are no maps, is a singular thought leader and innovator in what he describes as our post-industrial, post-geography "connection economy."

seth godin says:

"rather than merely tolerate change, we are all called now to rise to it. we are invited and stretched in whatever we do to be artists — to create in ways that matter to other people."

HOW DO THESE TWO CONCEPTS RELATE?  sri sri ravi shankar talks about how greed in its many forms disrupt the ecologial balance and seth godin talks about how greed for mass market share disrupts community balance. the new reality has got to be one of eco balance and community.

step one: take the thorn out of your own eye.
step two:take the thorn out of your neighbor's eye.